-The Histrionic Hammond turned Bubbly Blue-

Forever Fiftieth

2011-01-05T03:05:00.004-05:00

Husband

Perfect in my eyes is the one that you are

Pure in love and spirit, I adore.

Amor, amor, jadore, you are love.

He is in you in everything and everyday

From heaven to earth you came and touched my life

I feel you in every part of me, every day...I surrender to love...

You have stolen my heart, although I gave it quite freely

My mind cannot comprehend the blessing I have, the dream and prayer that is answered in you.

I am changed in every way, every time I hear you speak

I succumb to your adoration.

All I want is to be more, to be all, to be my best for you.

I can not be perfect, but I can try as always

Thank you for your constant patience and grace, for the forgiveness that flows without question.

I do not deserve the gift that you are but I receive it nonetheless.

Forever I will love, forever I will cherish, for you are the one my heart adores.

Dedicated to my love. Completed: January 4, 2011

For real? Fourty-Nine

2010-10-18T14:01:00.003-04:00

Last night Desmond came back from Tres Dias, and he had an AMAZING experience! I am so grateful to our beautiful Lord for teaching him new things and softening his heart in new ways...I know that this experience will serve to help him grow in the Lord, as a husband and eventually as a father :)

So, after he got back we decided to do a late night Waffle house dinner since we were both hungry and we ended up getting locked out of our house and having to sleep in our car!! It was a shock to the system and immediately brought us off the high we had been on. In this we both realized that life will always slap you in the face with something but that it is our choice whether or not we lose our joy....

Food for today's thought:

“Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain. Even if I am to be poured out like a drink offering upon the sacrificial offering of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with you all. Likewise you also should be glad and rejoice with me.” – Philippians 2.14-18

For Forty-Eight...

2010-10-04T00:19:00.004-04:00

Coffee

The sun like gold shines through trees of wisdom.

Cool wind whips and twists along the edge of day.

Sitting still, enjoying the embrace,

Facing the truth and shadow,

What a wonder.

Squinting to see the reality of abstraction.

Warmth that cools and cool that warms,

Light that darkens and darkness that lights.

O the mystery.

Sensing a shift and solidarity of the day to day.

Stare out at the shapes that pass,

The outer shells of integrity.

The knowledge learned fades at end,

The next day learned all over.

-JHB-

3.25.2008

Frightened Fourty-Seventh

2010-09-13T22:43:00.005-04:00

Saturday night, Des is in Cleveland, Josiah is at a friends, Mom and Derryck are out of town. Boots and I are alone in the house and so I'm a little freaked so mom tells me to turn on the alarm. I do and feel a bit better. 12:30ish I am searching for a gift card in the basement when I hear the alarm go off blazing through the house! I hear footsteps above me...I run, grab my phone, dash in my room, turn off the light and hide in the closet. I call 911...the woman starts asking 20 billion questions, and I try to answer them as best I can while trying not to breath!

I hear the footsteps moving around, the alarm goes off, I think maybe they cut the wire to it??

I hear the footsteps come down the basement steps, I hear the door to my room, the light comes on...I know I am about to die... then the light goes off and the door shuts, the person has left...

All of the sudden, I realize that it must be DESMOND! He would be the only one that would come straight to our room, look for me and then leave...I peak out and look and he's gone, I whisper "Hello...hello??" And suddenly there he is! The 911 operator is still on the phone waiting for me and I tell her, "It's just my husband, he drove into town and surprised me!!" I hang up and burst into tears as I was SO incredibly frightened I couldn't contain it... He hugs me and tells me HI! Haha! We go up to await the arrival of the sheriff who still had to come and check things out. We tell him what happened and he laughs and bids us good night!

Craziest night of my life, and I thought I was just gonna have a quiet girls night with masks and a foot spa...

Me with my face mask on, prior to the surprise from hell haha!

Food for today's thought:
"Life is a series of surprises, and would not be worth taking or keeping if it were not." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Favorite Fourty-SIxth :)

2010-09-10T12:57:00.006-04:00

I am married.
WOW!!
I can't believe it and it has already been 20 days!

Our wedding was priceless from start to finish.
My Desmond is so amazing, he started writing me letters from Thursday night before the Bachelorette Party until Saturday 30 minutes before our wedding. He drove all over to the places I would be like the bridal luncheon local, the nail salon etc... and I had a PS I love you letter experience at every location, it was incredible and I have never felt so loved and special in my life.

We had such an amazing experience at every step of the way. Our rehearsal dinner was priceless; after everyone ate, we gave friends the opportunity to say a few words and our family and friends poured blessings and funny stories over us.

We had such a blessed ceremony also, with a conclusion of our grandparents and parents coming on stage to pray over us as we start our lives together.

The reception was crazy and fun, dancing with all our friends and family was a treasure.

It all went by too quickly but even so, I don't mind because at the end of the night I laid next to my new husband and felt such peace.

I have been so blessed by God to be chosen to marry this man I have and I cannot wait to see where we will go and the things we will do.

Food for today's thought:
"Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate." -Barnett R. Brickner

Check out some of the pictures from our special day!

Flipping Fantastic Fourty-Fifth!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-02-18T15:33:00.012-05:00

I am the WORST blogger in the world. I know it, you know it haha!

So, here's the latest in my life...On November 7th, 2009

Desmond asked me to be his wife!!!

Desmond proposing to me!

With THIS!!! My GORGEOUS engagement ring!

So, needless to say, the past few months have been extremely busy and filled with lots of fun! My brother got married in December and he is now in MD finishing up his training for the army and should be back home withing the next month before being stationed somewhere.

I am still working on my MA in Counseling and I am working really hard. I have considered transferring and I am still considering that route as the program I am currently a part of is just too much Theology and not enough Counseling which will make me have to go an extra year. SO, I am planning a wedding, going to school, working part-time and also really jump starting my career as a Wedding and Lifestyles Photographer. My website www.flashesbyjill.com is currently in the works and should be up and fully functional by March or early April! I am soo blessed and excited about all the AWESOME things God has been doing in my life and I can't wait to see how the rest of 2010 will go!

Food for today's thought:

"The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It's a choice you make - not just on your wedding day, but over and over again -- and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife." -Barbara De Angelis

Fantastic Forty-Fourth!

2009-08-08T11:51:00.003-04:00

Hi everyone!!! Just wanted to give a brief update of my summer thus far in pictures!

This past month Des and I took a week long vacation to Wyoming to see his family, it was a REALLY long drive but so much fun! We stopped at the St. Lois Arch, went to a rodeo

Went to the Frontier Days in Cheyenne, where his family lives

Went to see Rodney Atkins, Kelli Pickler and Taylor Swift, and did and went so many things and places! It was a great time getting to know his family better and seeing who he is and where he comes from :) I was so blessed to be with all of them and look forward to many more times!

In June (28th) I turned 24! My sweet love took me on a shopping trip for my birthday and bought me clothes! It was so much fun and I felt like a princess! He is so amazing, it just amazes me more and more every single day, he is truly the love of my life...

My family threw a little cookout at my parents house to celebrate and we had such a great time! Here I am with Mom, Zo and mammy :)

So, that's about all that's been happening other than working at boring ol' Whirlpool every day m-f 8-5 :( BUT I am grateful for the money!

I hope everyone out there is blessed and enjoying every moment of summer they can get!

Food for today's thought:

Summer is the time when one sheds one's tensions with one's clothes, and the right kind of day is jeweled balm for the battered spirit. A few of those days and you can become drunk with the belief that all's right with the world. -Ada Louise Huxtable

Failed Fourty-Third.

2009-06-09T04:43:00.010-04:00

Hello out there????

I am a TOTAL blog failure!
Things have just gotten busier and busier and now things are slowwww so here I am.

First things first...hmm...

Well one of my best friends, Andrea was married May 16th in Virginia and I was blessed to be a bridesmaid! Desmond drove up with me and it was just an awesome time with people I love!

The three of us were college roommates and it was SUCH a blessing being able to share the experience together.

My sweet boyfriend was a wonderful date and help during the week of the wedding.

The bad news was that on my way home I was let go from my job. The family I was nannying for the past 8 months felt that they needed to find someone else because I was LOOKING for a job that would pay for my masters, even though I DON'T HAVE ANOTHER JOB!!! It has been a serious letdown and financially difficult time. Des has been such a life saver during this time and he is just such a rock for me. I am so blessed to have him!

I was hired at Whirlpool where I will be doing tech support etc... but I don't start until June 22nd which means I wont get paid til a week after that so I am currently at my grandparent's house where I have been re-doing their guest bathroom. SO I have been stripping wallpaper, sanding, putting up putty, re-sanding, priming and painting so it has been a long few days but they are going to pay me so that I can pay my rent this month.

That's what's been going on with me the past few weeks. I will be updating soon I promise haha!

Food for today's thought:

"As we drive along this road called life, occasionally a gal will find herself a little lost. And when that happens, I guess she has to let go of the coulda, shoulda, woulda, buckle up and just keep going."
~ Carrie Bradshaw

Fulfilled Forty-Second

2009-03-17T12:52:00.006-04:00

Hellllooo everyone!

I am trying to once again get in the habit of updating more frequently so here I am!

So a few weeks ago the basketball team played at Shorter College in our Conference championship and We WON!!! Des' dad came from Wyoming to support Des and the team and it was really nice to spend some more time getting to know him, he is such a precious man.

WE WHOOPED THEM!!!

Des cutting down his part of the net!

Des and his dad! He looks more like his brother though haha!

Me and me handsome man!

This past week Des cooked dinner for me during the week of our Six month anniversary! He made homemade mashed potatoes, green beans, and meatloaf. It was delicious!!!

SO yum!

He is SOOO amazing!!!

Us on our six month anniversary!

This Thursday I am leaving to go to Kansas City MO to go to the National Tournament! The guys left today and I can't wait to see Des already!

Hope you all are having a great St. Patrick's day!!!

Food for today's thought:

Oh, the music in the air! An' the joy that's ivrywhere - Shure, the whole blue vault of heaven is wan grand triumphal arch, An' the earth below is gay wid its tender green th'-day, fur the whole world is Irish on the Seventeenth o' March!

~Thomas Augustin Daly

Frenzied Forty-First

2009-02-25T08:27:00.005-05:00

I have been a total and utter slacker when it comes to this blog.

Ok, so there.

I'm back.

The past month and a half have been crazy busy...I was the Youth Director for Vida Nueva (Young women's retreat) last weekend, which was the culmination of about 5 months of planning and creating etc...So, the past 5 weekends in a row I have had to drive down to GA for meetings and to the weekend itself which has kept me busy in itself.

Also, weekend before last, Desmond and I celebrated our first Valentine's day and our 5 month anniversary! It was AMAZING!

My gifts to him: NBA socks, earrings, a scrapbook I made him and a strawberry cake I made him with homemade icing!

His gift to me....

This beautiful bag from COACH! I was completely surprised!!!

We went to the Hunter Museum of Art in Chattanooga and then to coffee, and dinner, a movie-He's Just Not That Into You- and walking around the city...

It was cold while we were walking but it was soo worth it!

It was the most precious day ever! He truly knows me, and he does because he really took the time to learn about me, to find out what I love and what makes me tick. It was so awesome!

As I said above, I just finished working on a young women's retreat called Vida Nueva which is Spanish for "new life." It is a faaaantastic way to connect with other christian's and to grow with God. To find out more info visit www.ngvn.org. I was blessed to be the Youth Director, which is like second in command under the Director. It was a hectic job but so fun and so fulfilling. It is amazing to see how God changes the hearts of the girls and to see him becoming real to them for the first time.

I also just moved, AGAIN. Actually, my AMAZING boyfriend moved me. He surprised me three times, once with all my things put into boxes, next with all the boxes being moved to the new place, and while I was at Vida Nueva, all my furniture being moved! It was Unbelievable! I had no idea he was going to do all of it and it was such a blessing! Since I work all day he knew I would have little to no time and so he just did it when he was not at practice or school...such a keeper :) Hopefully this is my last move until next year, I LOVE my new place, I have stuff in boxes right now but as soon as its all unpacked I will post some pics!

Much love and happy thoughts!

Jill

Double Food for today's thought:

"Faith never knows where it is being led, but it loves and knows the One who is leading."
-Oswald Chambers

"If your heart takes more pleasure in reading novels, or watching TV, or going to the movies, or talking to friends, rather than just sitting alone with God and embracing Him, sharing His cares and His burdens, weeping and rejoicing with Him, then how are you going to handle forever and ever in His presence...? You'd be bored to tears in heaven, if you're not ecstatic about God now!" -Keith Green

Festive Fortieth

2009-01-13T18:06:00.005-05:00

OK OK OK! I know it has been a LONG time since I last posted...BUT things have been busy! First there was Thanksgiving, then my graduation, then Christmas and New Years!

The Fam on Christmas Day

Hangin out with friends and fam on New Year's Eve

I spent New Year's day taking engagement pictures for my sister and her fiance. Here are a few from the shoot:

Last week my best friend, Emily who has been living in British Colombia, Canada for the past 2 1/2 years finally came home for a visit! She came up to Cleveland on Monday and we got to hang out all day! It was soo great to see her and catch up!

SO, I don't know what all to expect for 2009 but I am really excited! I know that the Lord has a specific plan for me and I just want to do what he wants for my life and I am seeking him for exactly that.

I hope everyone is doing well in your own corners of the world...much love from mine!

Jill

Food for today's thought:

"Beginning is easy-continuing is hard." -Japanese Proverb

Thrilled Thirty-Ninth

2008-12-16T17:13:00.005-05:00

Sorry for the lack of posting, the past few weeks have been INSANE! I have been trying to get things done to graduate and that included 2 exams, a 10 page research paper and 6 pages of service papers, not including work and my regular life!

Anyway, all the hard work has paid off and I am now

a COLLEGE GRADUATE!!!!!!!!!

Shaking our president, Dr. Conn's hand and getting that diploma!!!

Des and I, isn't he handsome??!!??

The Siblings minus one :(

My mom, me and my aunt-she also graduated from Lee with a BA in Psych like me!

My wonderful amazing grandparents!

My beautiful graduation ring!!!

Needless to say, I was shocked when I walked across that stage...I really never imagined myself graduating! I think its because I have been there for so long!

It is such a strange feeling to be done with school...after 18 years of school I barely know anything else...it is what I have been comfortable knowing...So now I am thrust out into the wide world of endless options feeling very untrained and lacking in guidance. However, there is always grad school in the fall...back into the comfort zone I go!

Food for today's thought:

“I hope your dreams take you... to the corners of your smiles, to the highest of your hopes, to the windows of your opportunities, and to the most special places your heart has ever known.”

Thanksgiving Thirty-Eighth

2008-12-02T09:35:00.005-05:00

So it's been quite awhile since I updated...things have just been a little crazy here on my end...

Last week was Thanksgiving, Desmond and I drove home to Atlanta last Tuesday and had Thanksgiving with my dad's side of the family. We went to my g-parents house Wednesday and I helped her cook, and that night we went out with Murray and Stacey-Des' best friend and his girlfriend-we went to see Four Christmases, which is really funny, definitely recommend it! Thursday was Thanksgiving with my mom's family, Friday was Black Friday shopping at 6 am and Desmond's b-ball game in south Atlanta, Saturday was my brothers 15th birthday party, Sunday was church and our return to Cleveland!!! Whew!!! Sorry to bore you with all the details but that just explains my lack of writing!

Des and I at about 5:30 on our way to the mall!!! It was sooo early and cold!!!

So this week is filled with reading and writing as I finish up my last college course and my service learning hours before graduation NEX

T SATURDAY- December 13th!!!!!!!

WOW.

I can't think about that right now...I'll think about it tomorrow and write about it later...

Sorry I don't have very many pictures I just was on picture taking hiatus this Thanksgiving...

Love you all!

Food for today's thought:

"Forever on Thanksgiving day the heart will find the pathway home." -Wilbur D. Nesbit

Total Thirty-Seventh

2008-11-10T19:34:00.013-05:00

I have had a 5 day weekend like NO other! It all started last Thursday night at the Basketball game, Lee vs. Temple- one of our largest and longest rivals- I went to that game with some friends to cheer Des on, and we won 58-67!!!

Me, Ashley and Paris cheerin

on the Flames!!!

My handsome

boy after the game :)

Friday night I went to the EVS (my old choir, the Evangelistic Singers) alumni get-together as it was our 40th reunion. I saw some of my lovely friends, it was soo great to catch up with everyone after such a long time!

Some of the EVS Alumni

plus a few new faces...

After the Alumni get together my parents took Des and I out to eat at Carrabba's. It was a really nice time just catching up and letting my parents and Des get to know each other better.

Saturday morning I had EVS practice then I had roommate pictures to take, then back to the house for a luncheon one of the roomies (Liz) mom and grandma made for us. After that I met up with my parents for the basketball game against Montreat College, who we killed at 92-66!! Then I sang with EVS Saturday night at the homecoming music festival after which my friends and I went to Applebee's...

The lovely ladies of 2250, me Liz, Courtney, Laura, Hannah and Jenny

Leaping!!!

Sepia.

"Walk beside me and be my friend..."

Bonding on the bridge :)

Mom and I at Desmond's game :)

Des and I at Applebee's after singing with EVS.

Sunday morning my parents took Des and I out to breakfast at Cracker Barrell, and then we all hung out for a few hours until I had to go meet up with EVS. Desmond and I went to the EVS concert together which was just like old times...we sang for a good hour and a half, all the old songs that still touch my heart when I sing them. I am soo grateful for the time I had with EVS, many of the things I learned there are still evident in my life today and I am a better person because of the people I met and the experiences I had during my time in EVS...

All in all it was a BLAST of a weekend...a little tiring but very fun and fulfilling!!!

Hope you all are doing well and loving November as I am!

Food for today's thought:

"Autumn, the year's last, loveliest smile." -William Cullen Bryant

Tired of T's (and dreading the F's) Thirty-Sixth

2008-11-04T15:15:00.007-05:00

Hello blogger world! Just thought I would share a little of my Halloween with you...We had quite a party at our house this past weekend with friends and dancing all around! 2 of my friends from Atlanta even came up to hangout! Here are some pics, enjoy!!!

My roomates Courtney (as a man), me (as Dorothy) and Jenny as a sexy ladybug lol!

Another roomie Hannah as a footballer

All the roomies minus Courtney- Me, Hannah, Laura (as her boyfriend), Liz (as a gogo dancer) and Jenny

I love these girls!

I love these girls too! My Atl buddies, Kristin and Ashley- they were cobwebs lol!

My handsome man, he wasn't dressed up yet, he was zorro, it was hilarious!!!

Food for today's thought:

"Double, double toil and trouble; fire burn and cauldron bubble." -Shakespeare "Macbeth"

Truly Thankful Thirty-Fifth

2008-10-28T16:48:00.004-04:00

Sharing a kiss :)

In August when I broke up with Jonathan, my plans for the future crumbled.

I felt lost, unloved, used up and totally clueless as to what God wanted for me.

I decided to just move on, to let God take control even though I could not understand.

God has been working on me ever since...he is healing my heart and my mind. Changing me from the inside out. He also brought Desmond into my life.

Desmond and I literally fell into this relationship, with God as the guide...I seriously thought I wouldn't be dating again for the next several years, and he, after getting out of a rough relationship back in May thought the same thing.

We both PLANNED to stay single, date casually and let our wounds from the past fester. Little did we know that God would plop us into each others lives to heal those wounds and teach us soo much.

The past 2 months have been a whirlwind. Never have I known a guy so willing to put his heart on the line, to go all in, to commit fully and share his life with me completely. I am so honored to be called his girlfriend because of who he is and because of how he is with me...

I can't wait to see where God takes us on this road we've started, but in the meantime, I am just loving every minute I have with him.

The happiest ever,

Jill

Food for today's thought:

"Love isn't something you find. Love is something that finds you." -Loretta Young

Tenacious Thirty-Fourth

2008-10-23T09:19:00.005-04:00

OK, so I had a nannying interview 2 Sunday's ago, and then last Friday the mom called back and said that they were having a hard time deciding between me and one other girl, so they asked me to come this week for a trial week...so I have been keeping their precious 4 month old, 5 and 9 year old boys the past 3 days... Last night the dad talked to me and said that they had a great feeling from me from my interview and that the past 3 days with me have run so smoothly, that as long as the rest of the week goes well they will be offering me the full-time position! So I will work Tues-Thur 7:15-6 and either Mon or Fri I'll work a half day. I may work some weekends, but I will be paid overtime for that and it will be planned in advance. So I will be making 300+ a week! PRAISE GOD!!!!!! I have been SO stressed about money and this is just what I need! Also, they are going on a vacation to Disney World, and I will be going with them the 18th-23rd. We are flying down, and staying at the luxury resort villas at The Wilderness Lodge!!! All of that and I'll be getting paid for it! I also get paid holiday's! This is the most amazing job ever! O AND the mom is a Physician's Assistant and so if I get sick she can see me for free!!!

YAY!!!!

"A Nanny's job is priceless, such precious minds to reach...
A job done out of compassion and love for the ones they teach." -Unkown

Tearful Thirty-Third :)

2008-10-15T13:58:00.005-04:00

The Program.

The first kiss!!!

Walking out as husband and wife!!!

The bridal party!

Me and my super handsome date!

The Bridesmaids with our friend Jessica

Chilling with Liz and Jessie at the Reception

Drinking some sparkling cider

My contribution to the getaway car-Wes' g-mother's face was priceless when she read this lol!

This past weekend my two precious friends got married!!! Sussy and Wes tied the knot! If you know these two you know that their relationship has been such a long crazy story...it all started in 2003 when they met in a choir called The Evangelistic Singers, or EVS as we former members call it :) Wes and Sussy became great friends through ministering together and traveling all over the US as well as Jamaica and the Bahamas...Sussy started to fall in love with Wes way back then, but Wes just wanted to keep things at a friendship level...fast forward to December 2006...Wes tells me and a few others that literally OUT OF THE BLUE he has developed feelings for Sussy. We all are totally taken aback because he has never really had feelings for her like that. So January rolls around and Wes just tells her, I have feelings for you and they start dating! Roll forward to October 2007, with the help of me, and 3 others, Wes proposes to Sussy on a mountaintop here in TN! And now, as of Saturday they are married! This is such a short, uninvolved description of how God plans things out perfectly. He totally knows what he's doing and he does give us the desires of our hearts!!!

Food for today's thought:

"Why is it that people get married? Because we need a witness to our lives. There’s a billion people on the planet. What does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything…The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things, All of it… all the time, every day. You’re saying “Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go unwitnessed - because I will be your witness.”

-Wife in the movie, "Shall We Dance?"

Tremendous Thirty-Second

2008-10-06T17:30:00.010-04:00

WOW! So much to talk about...Last weekend my 20 year old cousin got married! I cannot believe it! I will never forget living together as kids, playing, swimming, laughing, talking and all of the perks of cousinhood... She was a beautiful

bride and I am soo happy for her and her new hubby!

This past weekend I gave my practice talk for VN and it was a little too short but I got a lot of great responses that really made me feel more confident in the whole thing... I am really excited about the weekend, I know that God is teaching me something already and its such a blessing.

Also this past weekend, my dear friend Sussy had her

bachelorette party! She and I have been friends for about 4 years and we were roommates for 1. She is marrying one of my best friends, Wes, and I am sooo excited for both of them! I can't believe that they are getting married this weekend! I am heading out to North Carolina on Friday for the rehearsal dinner Friday night and the wedding Saturday! I am a bridesmaid so I have to get all ready for these things this week, gotta give myself a mani-pedi and figure out the shoes, jewelry and hair situation, you know, all the girly things :) I can't wait!

Sussy and her cherry stem "v-card" haha!Me and Nikki

Sussy lookin gorgeous!!!

Some of the girls chillin at Mellow Mushroom

Sussy takin one of several shots lol!

Desmond went home with me not this weekend but last and we had a blast! My family really liked him and he really liked them! It was just soo much fun! He and I have been having a wonderful time together and I am so thankful that I have him in my life!

Thats about all for now, love to you all!

Jill

Food for today's thought:

"What you are as a single person, you will be as a married person, only to a greater degree. Any negative character trait will be intensified in a marriage relationship, because you will feel free to let your guard down -- that person has committed himself to you and you no longer have to worry about scaring him off." -Josh McDowell

Thankful Thirty-First

2008-09-22T19:55:00.004-04:00

It has been about a month and a half since I broke up with Jonathan and I can tell you that I am truly happy...

For three years I had mentally pictured myself with him... I had tried to mold myself into what I felt he wanted (this is really my fault), I had tried to side-step the things in him that I knew would clash with my heart and desires, I made excuses for our relationship, I tried to assure myself that time would bring about change and that maturity would come and that commitment would be there if I just did this, or this or this...

Wow, I was drained.

There was so much of myself that I had let go of in many ways because I felt I had to be a certain person every day (this is also really my fault) and I was soo tired, and unable to see my life without him attached.

This past month has been a huge mental, emotional, spiritual roller-coaster filled with doubts, hopes, fears and a happiness I have never known.

I am so grateful for the time I spent with Jonathan... Being with him taught me so much about life from a different perspective, how to fight fairly, how to be fully committed and how to love... His friendship is something I will forever cherish and there will be a part of him in my heart always but I know that my decision was the right one for me...

Over the past month I started talking to a friend of mine- we've been friends for a year now- we rekindled our friendship and out of the clear blue, an attraction formed... it has been such a whirlwind, but it feels soo right. I have peace and joy and I am being treated like a queen, which has actually been hard to accept but I am learning. His words and actions have healed a place in my heart that I don't think I even knew needed healing... He and I are dating "officially" but still taking things one day at a time. I thank God for putting him into my life and I am excited to see where it goes :)

I hope that your first day of fall is free and fun and that you all enjoy it!

All my love,

Jill

Food for today's thought:

"Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom."

-Marcel Proust

Thought-filled Thirtieth

2008-09-15T00:31:00.004-04:00

Much is going on in my mind right now... decisions and hopes and concerns... not really wanting to share right now but would appreciate your prayers.

Due to the fact that gas is currently 4.99 a gallon, I have literally spent the past 3 days at home just saving my gas that I filled up last week when it was the normal 3.49ish so I have been just about crazy, sitting at home so today I went to a friends house just to hang out and it was really nice :)

Not much is going on with me right now, I am just working on finding a job and working on my classwork.

So, hope everything is going well with all of you out there around the world :)

Food for today's thought:

"No one knows exactly where thought comes from, but it can be said that thought comes from the same place as whatever it is that beats our heart... it comes from being alive."

-Richard Carlson

The Twenty-Ninth

2008-09-08T00:51:00.006-04:00

...ing

Savoring memories like the sand on the shore

Holding your breath til they slip back into darkness.

Wishing your mind could understand all that you cannot.

Hoping the voice of reason comes not from within

Trusting the One who cannot be seen, trying desperately so.

Wandering thoughts and tears trace against the canvas of your life, waiting to be portrayed.

Dying to know the secrets that are all around, waiting patiently for the One to reveal them.

Failing and falling again and again

Getting up and doing it all over.

Knowing He loves you is just not enough, it's so hard to completely trust.

Daring yourself to simply obey, struggling with your own flesh.

Dying to yourself day after day and you're worn down to nothing.

Anything would be better than the nothing you feel, the incompetence of your self.

Trying to be the best you can

Putting up walls to knock yourself down before you can fall.

Aching to feel secure and loved, to trust, to fly, to love completely...

I wrote this poem about a year and a half ago to and about God...it just truly describes so much of who I was at that time and who I am still becoming... I am still learning to trust and to let myself fall, learning to live through failure and learning to be secure and loved in the One who gave it all to me...

Food for today's thought:

“I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.”

- Mahatma Gandhi

Truthful Twenty-Eighth

2008-09-08T00:18:00.003-04:00

Let it go for 2008
By: T. D. Jakes

There are people who can walk away from you.
And hear me when I tell you this!
When people can walk away from you: let them walk.

I don't want you to try to talk another person into staying with you,
loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you,
staying attached to you.
I mean hang up the phone.

When people can walk away from you let them walk.
Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left.

People leave you because they are not joined to you.
And if they are not joined to you,
you can't make them stay.
Let them go.

And it doesn't mean that they are a bad person,
it just means that their part in the story is over.
And you've got to know when people's
part in your story is over so that you
don't keep trying to raise the dead.

You've got to know when it's dead.
You've got to know when it's over.
Let me tell you something.
I've got the gift of good-bye.
It's the tenth spiritual gift,
I believe in good-bye.

It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful,
and I know whatever God means for me to have
He'll give it to me.
And if it takes too much sweat I don't need it.
Stop begging people to stay.
Let them go!!

If you are holding on to something
that doesn't belong to you and was never intended for your life,
then you need to ...LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to past hurts and pains .
LET IT GO!!!

If someone can't treat you right, love you back, and see your worth...
LET IT GO!!!

If someone has angered you ...
LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge
LET IT GO!!!

If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction ...
LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or
talents ..
LET IT GO!!!

If you have a bad attitude...
LET IT GO!!!

If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better...
LET IT GO!!!

If you're stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new
level in Him...
LET IT GO!!!

If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship....
LET IT GO!!!

If you keep trying to help someone who won't even try to help
themselves..
LET IT GO!!!

If you're feeling depressed and stressed ....
LET IT GO!!!

If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling
yourself and God is saying "take your hands off of it," then you need to...
LET IT GO!!!

Let the past be the past.
Forget the former things.
GOD is doing a new thing for 2008 !!!
LET IT GO!!!

Get Right or Get Left .. think about it, and then
LET IT GO!!!

"The Battle is the Lord's!"

Terrific Twenty-Seventh

2008-09-05T18:02:00.009-04:00

Jesus is soo awesome.

I am just truly happy and so excited about the future, I feel complete in God, I feel like my decisions are justified and just right...

I can't wait to see what else He has in store for my life.

I am enrolled in my independent study class and I am working on it right now...my car is not yet fixed but should be in a few days so I will be able to get another job soon (say a prayer!)

I just love all of you out there in bloggerville.

Much love~

Jill

Double food for today's thought:

"There are things that we never want to let go of, people we never want to leave behind, but keep in mind that letting go isn't the end of the work, it's the beginning of a new life."

-Unknown

"Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step."

-Martin Luther King Jr.

Trip twenty-sixth

2008-08-29T17:45:00.005-04:00

Amanda and I Christmas 2006

I am currently in Richmond, Virginia at one of my best friend's Amanda's house! I haven't gotten to see her in soo long and it is so nice to get away and see friends and have fun :) I'm sure I will update later on with more updates!

L O V E

Food for today's thought:

"The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page." -St. Augustine

True Twenthy-Fifth

2008-08-27T17:04:00.010-04:00

You

By: Jill Hammond

Your scent.
Your Smile.
That look, in your eye.

Your secret.
Your sigh.
Those thoughts, in your mind.

Knowing you more than myself.

The in's.
The out's.
The laugh's, the cries.

Prayer's and kisses.
Ideas and pain.
The years have flown and crept by.

Your presence.
Your heart.
Those moments we shared.

Your faith.
Your insecurities.
Learning love can't always be easy.

The trying and failing.
The commitment and flaws.
I've learned more than I knew.

The pleasing.
The trying.
It was all for the best.

There can be no regrets.

Food for today's thought:
"We may encounter many defeats but we must not be defeated." -Maya Angelou

Thrilling Twenty-Fourth UPDATE

2008-08-26T04:12:00.006-04:00

So, tonight Jonathan calls and asks if I want to go to dinner, I told him I couldn't afford it so he asks if I want to go to Starbucks, I say, OK. So we go and we talk for a bit and things are ok and then the convo heads toward the breakup and things start to get rough... Basically he doesn't see us ever getting back together as of right now, he says he loves me enough to let me go, although I find that hard to understand considering he didn't love me enough to LOVE ME while we were together, he didn't fight for the relationship.

I think he is somewhat relieved that its over...but he says he does love me, but since he has no answer from God, then he wants to let me go.

So, he told me that he wants to be friends, not like we were but just like call every now and then etc...I told him that I can't do it. I love him too much and it hurts too badly. I don't think he can possibly love me the way I love him otherwise he couldn't just be my friend...

Anyway we ended our friendship tonight, well, as

he says I ended it because he says he doesn't want us to not be friends. I wish we could be but right now it is impossible. I love him soo very much that I can't ever move on and still have him near me.

Well, I came home crying my eyes out after that whole ordeal and my sweet roomies were there to cheer me up... thats when I noticed my split-ends...they were really really bad, so I ask Courtney to trim my hair, and then I say, No lets hack it!!! So, we cut off about 7-8 inches! Jonathan always told me he LOVED my hair and begged me not to cut it, well screw that!!!

What do you think??? I LOVE IT! I feel like a 3 year weight was lifted off my shoulders, literally!!! I think I may go get it professionally trimmed today and get a little more angular with it :)

"All women need to have a breakup haircut. Many women swear by this almost as a rite of passage. Logically, it's the worst thing you can do after a breakup. You're irrational, you're emotional, you're everything you shouldn't be when you sit on that swivel chair and ask the stylist to chop off your locks. But what you get out of this simple act of a haircut is indescribable. It's almost a sense of liberation. Like the emancipation of that part of your life. You're chopping off a part of you. You're making a change. You're ready to start anew. The old you is being swept up by the bottom-of-the-food-chain intern at the hair salon and thrown in the garbage bin.

Gone.

For good.

All women need a breakup haircut." -Random girl on Blogger.

SO after I posted this I decided to go get another hair cut, and here it is... I am not in love with it, they cut the long angles I wanted in the front, and so I'm really disappointed in it, but my best friend is a hairdresser an is coming in a few days to stay with me and I am going to have her fix it :)
I

Tiring Twenty-Third

2008-08-22T23:23:00.009-04:00

This is where I spent the majority of my day- The Humanities Center...

O my word! I was at Lee for 4 hours today trying to figure out my class situation...

Finally, I got the dean to approve my art minor, however I am still short 3 hours to graduate, so after getting 4 signatures-that took like 2 1/2 hours- 3 pages a typed proposition and a filled out application, I took my proposal to the dean of my department asking permission to be allowed to take Pastoral Counseling as Independent study so that I can work full-time. SO I should know by next week whether or not I am approved for Independent Study...please say a prayer that God will work this out!!!

My mole seems to be better sort of...I still haven't been able to get an appointment with a dermatologist...

My back was better and is now hurting again, so I am going to the chiropractor again in the morning so hopefully it will be another week of relief...

I am still looking for another job so keep that in your prayers...I am in desperate need of some money!

I went swimming with some friends last night and it was a great time of just hanging out and getting to know knew people...I felt single which was weird but necessary. I know the more I move on the better I'll feel. I hope that as time goes on things will keep getting easier cuz right now they still just catch up to me and catch me off guard and it can be really disheartening and then there are days when I feel totally fine like nothing's wrong or out of place. I guess this is just the process of a serious breakup.

So I'm tired now, and I'm trying because it has been terrible, but I know that it will be terrific when all is said and done.

All the love I can,

Jill

Food For Today's Thought:

"The best thing about loving and being hurt is that you get to know what true love really is... for as gold is tested in fire, so will love be perfected in pain." - Unknown

Trying Twenty-Second

2008-08-19T15:37:00.006-04:00

After several long days and nights of crying and asking God why? I am feeling better...It is still so painful to think of him, to think of times shared, to remember moments, to realize there will be no new moments, to know I will never kiss him or hold him again...it hurts so badly but I know that I made the best decision I could make.

I sprained my back last week and have had to go to the chiropractor the past 2 days and need to go again on sat. Its been a painful ordeal and I haven't been able to work out in over a week ick! Hopefully it will all be better by next week.

I have a strange mole on my neck that is infected and I am worried about it so I am going to find a dermatologist to go to, please just keep my back and that mole in your prayers.

I got new contacts yesterday after wearing a pair of 2 week disposables for 7 months and my eyes are thanking me :)

I was asked to give a talk at Vida Nueva in October and I am very excited and nervous about it but I know that it is going to put an awesome opportunity for God to teach me something new.

I have made a new friend, Ashley; her mom and my mom are seriously BFF's and we just really got to know each other last weekend. It was sooo much fun sippin margarita's and eatin fajitas with our mom's talking about boyfriends-and the lack thereof- and God and Tres Dias and VN, it was just soo refreshing. She and I are in such similar places in our lives and it was just totally a God thing! We spent all of Friday evening, night and all of Saturday and night together lol, it was awesome!

I am back in Cleveland for the first day after I broke up with Jon and I am so scared to see him...We talked for a long time yesterday, he has a cyst in his sinus' and he is scared about it; it was a good talk but it made me miss him so terribly...I am still in love with him I just don't think it's meant to be and I have to stick to my guns and learn to let him go completely...

I am in desperate need of a second job so here is my list of prayer needs:

Healing from Jon

Healing for my back

Protection over that mole, that there would be nothing serious

Favor from God that I will be allowed to "test out of" my final 3 hours so I can be done with school

A second job so that I can pay my bills

Thanks for all of your care and concern to those of you that do :)

All my love,

Food For Today's Thought:

"Some of the biggest challenges in relationships come from the fact that most people enter a relationship in order to get something: they're trying to find someone who's going to make them feel good. In reality, the only way a relationship will last is if you (both) see your relationship as a place you go to give, and not a place that you go to take." -Anthony Robbins

Tragic Twenty-First

2008-08-16T02:30:00.006-04:00

'Near To You'

-A Fine Frenzy-

He and I had something beautiful

But so dysfunctional, it couldn't last

I loved him so but I let him go

'Cause I knew he'd never love me back

Such pain as this

Shouldn't have to be experienced

I'm still reeling from the loss,

Still a little bit delirious

Near to you, I am healing

But it's taking so long

'Cause though he's gone

And you are wonderful

It's hard to move on

Yet, I'm better near to you.

You and I have something different

And I'm enjoying it cautiously

I'm battle scarred, I am working oh so hard

To get back to who I used to be

He's disappearing

Fading suddenly

I'm so close to being yours

Won't you stay with me

Please

Near to you, I am healing

But it's taking so long

'Cause though he's gone

And you are wonderful

It's hard to move on

Yet, I'm better near to you.

I only know that I am

Better where you are

I only know that I am

Better where you are

I only know that I belong

Where you are

Near to you, I am healing

But it's taking so long

Though he's gone

And you are wonderful

It's hard to move on

Near to you, I am healing

But it's taking so long

'Cause though he's gone

And you are wonderful

It's hard to move on

Yet, I'm better near to you.

Parts of these lyrics describe my current feelings so perfectly, and parts of them describe who I hope to be after the pain of this has passed.

Food For Today's Thought: "Giving up doesn't always mean you're weak, sometimes it just means that you're strong enough to Let Go..." -Unknown

Terrible Twentieth

2008-08-11T06:59:00.004-04:00

Poured out like rain on a desert

Not one drop to spare.

The time has ticked by in a slowed race and it's still here.

Poured out over and over so dry and bare.

Shoulders slumped, eyes heavy downcast, in despair.

Poured out there's nothing left, why even ask?

Tired from crying, heart breaking, silence is best.

Poured out. Poured out.

None left to share.

The realization of the failure looms in the air.

Poured out for the last time.

There is always an ending no matter what the rhyme.

Poured out.

"I know I have a heart because I can feel it breaking" -Wizard of Oz

New Nineteenth

2008-08-05T02:36:00.005-04:00

Ok, last week my comp slipped off my bed, destroying my hard-drive- which means I lost EVERYTHING! Fortunately I had Apple Protection, and so I had my hard-drive and keyboard replaced for free. Thank the Lord I had uploaded over 2,000 pictures onto facebook, which are now chillin' in iPhoto, after dragging them one-by-one, which took about an entire day :/ also, most of my music was from CD's, so I will have to re-burn them into iTunes when I have the chance...

Sooo the woman that I was baby-sitting for is genuinely crazy, I mean she honestly could use meds for OCD...so needless to say, I am no longer with her family, however I found another family in Cleveland, so I don't have the 1 and a half there and back commute that I had, and they pay the same, the only difference is there are fewer hours, so I am now looking for another part time job that will supplement the rest of the income that I need.

I am looking forward to working with this family, the kids and the parents are all just great!

School starts the 20th, and I am NOT looking forward to it, I LOVE summer and do not want it to end, however it does mean I am that much closer to graduating...which I am feeling more and more apprehensive of...AHH. Thats for another post. For now, I am going to try to sleep, since its 2:52 am!

Goodnight all.

Food for today's thought:

"Here's to the nights where the sand is your seat, the waves kiss your feet, and your friends outnumber the stars." -Unknown

Energetic Eighteenth

2008-07-27T19:31:00.001-04:00

Jon and I on our 6 month anniversary :)

On my way to dinner and a movie with friends...

So for almost 2 weeks I have not had to work, I was not on the schedule for awhile and then the family I work for had their step-daughter keep the 2 kids for awhile so, I am on a semi vacation...however, the setback to this is not making money so hopefully I will be back on the schedule this week!

I have had so much energy during this 2 week break, I helped clean out my room at home-my parents have our house on the market, and helped my get the house cleaned and organized, then came back to Cleveland and helped my boyfriend clean and organize his house and we celebrated our 6 month anniversary :) then I spent all of yesterday cleaning my room and getting things that I never had a chance to unpack, unpacked. I still have some unpacking to do but should be done in the next few days.

I also have just had a blast with my friends this week, just so much fun hanging out and spending time together, it's really felt more like summer and its been so nice :)

So, I am gonna clean some more and then meet Jonathan at the gym for bf/gf workout!

Love.

Food for today's thought:

"The summer night is like a perfection of thought." -Wallace Stevens

Short Seventeenth

2008-07-22T14:56:00.000-04:00

Not much to update here...Zoe made it safely to Colombia and we miss her already!

Tomorrow is my 6 month (new) anniversary with Jonathan, so I am going back to Cleveland; I've been at home for over a week just chillin with the fam.

Today mammy and peepaw (my grandparents) came over and brought lunch with them-mammy's famous chicken salad! It was nice to hangout and fellowship.

This afternoon Aaron, Zoe's boyfriend-who is living at our house on and off- and I are going to see The new Batman movie The Dark Knight, I'm trying to befriend him and help take his mind off missing Zo so much poor guy :(

So, thats all for now!

Food for today's thought:

"Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness."- Martin Luther King Jr.

Sorta Sad Sixteenth

2008-07-15T16:30:00.000-04:00

A montage for Zo:

This is Zoe's leaving week, she is moving to Bogota, Colombia in South America to be a missionary for awhile, and I am sorta sad thats she's leaving, sorta sad in the sense that I am so happy for her because she has been wanting this for so long but sad in the sense that I am gonna miss her soo much!

Zo, I know that your gonna read this, and I just want you to know that I love you so much and I am so glad that through the crappy stuff I got you :) I am soo excited that you are gonna live out the calling you have felt for so long and I can't wait to see what happens with dresses ;)

Love you so much!

Food for today's thought:

"Sisters annoy, interfere, criticize. Indulge in monumental sulks, in huffs, in snide remarks. Borrow. Break. Monopolize the bathroom. Are always underfoot. But, if catastrophe should strike, sisters are there, defending you against all comers. -Pam Brown

Feeling Fifteenth

2008-07-09T16:06:00.001-04:00

Well, as the title says, I am feeling...a lot. Although I don't really feel like getting into it all, I did want to express some of my thoughts.

I am missing my boyfriend Jonathan, due to my Canadian visit and his ministry work we have only seen each other one day for three weeks, and I am missing his presence in my day-to-day...

Memorial day, May 2008

I am already missing my sister, Zoe who is moving to Colombia, South America next week to start her life as a missionary there...

Memorial day craziness, May 2008...

I am missing my dad, with little reason to give, other than with the things and thoughts that are going on right now, his presence is greatly missed...

My little brother Ben, Daddy and me circa 1992...

I am missing my 2 dear friends Andrea and Amanda because they mean the world to me, and not having them here is more difficult than I ever expected...

Amanda, Andrea and I in our last month of college together, May 2007...

So, with all that said, I know life goes on, and missing people only makes them more special :)

Food for todays thought:

"Why can't we get all the people together in this world that we really like and then just stay together? I guess that wouldn't work. Someone would leave. Someone always leaves. Then we would have to say good-bye. I hate good-buys. I know what I need. I need more hello's.

-Charles M. Schulz

Fresh Fourteenth

2008-07-07T00:48:00.001-04:00

Well, as demanded :) by my sister, it's time for an update:

So, we rolled in yesterday afternoon from Canada, exhausted, as we had gotten up at 3:30 that morning, had a flight, a layover and a delayed flight back into Atlanta...My grandparents graciously picked Zoe and I up from the airport and then waited around for Mom, Derryck and Josiah to roll in about an hour later. After picking us up they dropped Zo and Jo off and the 5 of us went to Mexican, enjoying a nice margarita and some lovely food :)

Last night I went to bed at 9, and slept til 10 this morning lol, I was soo tired, but today I felt much more fresh and revived, however it is time for sleep again, and I am getting sleepy!

Canada was amazing and so much fun, I loved being there and meeting new family, it was a definite blessing!

Tomorrow is a fun day planned with Zoe, a girls day that I am looking forward to!

Enjoy some pics of the trip!

Food for today's thought:

"I have spread my dreams beneath your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams."

-W.B. Yeats

Toronto Thirteenth

2008-06-27T14:01:00.000-04:00

Well currently I am sitting (as you can see in the top pic) in the Toronto airport waiting for my flight to Calgary. I am meeting up with the fam for Derryck's family's family reunion...thats a weird sentence huh?

We will be in Canada til the 5th and I'm looking forward to spending my birthday-tomorrow in Banff, which everyone says is absolutely gorgeous!

This airport is huge and my feet are killing me, and I can't wait to get to where I'm getting...

The second pic is a skyline of Toronto, wish I could see more than what I get from the airport window...

I'll write soon!

Food for today's thought:

"Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry and narow-mindedness." -Mark Twain

The Totally Tired Twelfth!

2008-06-17T20:55:00.000-04:00

Whew! I am soo worn out. Working out, working all morning every day, class every afternoon, 2 exams this week, and work 7-7 on sat and sun...I will be relieved when this week is over!!! I have had a good time this week though, I went home with Jonathan for fathers day, and then came home Sun to 2 of my friends birthdays which was a blast.

In other news, I have found a new job, a better one! I will be a nanny for two great kids, making $10 an hour! Yay! I start there this sat, the 7-7 and I am looking forward to it.

Jonathan has been asked to come back to Virginia to take the next step in accepting a youth pastor position at a church in Richmond, and they have asked me to come as well, and they are paying for our flights and everything :) I think its crazy and cool and scary and exciting all rolled into one...just need to keep praying and being open to possibilities...

Anyway, thats all for now!

Food for today's thought:

"Pray as though everything depended on God. Work as though everything depends on you."

-St. Augustine

Easier Eleventh

2008-06-04T22:11:00.000-04:00

Well science has proven to be MUCH easier than I thought it was going to be. Class is supposed to be from 1-4:50 and the third day in, the latest we have gotten out is 3:30! The professor doesn't like having such long classes, so we don't stay late. There has been no homework, no quizzes and the lab is EASY! Thank God for such a break!

On another note, I made a B+ in Spanish 211, which was the first 2 weeks of last month and a A- (!!!) in Spanish 212, the last 2 weeks of last month!!! I am soo pleased and grateful to have gotten the grades I did and I am soo happy!

On one other note, I have lost 12 pounds since the beginning of last month! Weight Watchers and continual healthy eating and exercise have really paid off and I am happy with the results.

Also, I am in a wedding on Saturday for a friend of mine that I have had since we were 7 and I am looking forward to seeing her and others that I haven't seen in forever.

So, this month, things are easier than I thought that they would be and I am relieved...the only downside is the waking up at 6 am, I HATE it! So please pray for continued strength for me to keep pushing through.

Food for today's thought:

"You must begin to think of yourself as becoming the person you want to be." -David Viscott

Tired Tenth...

2008-06-01T17:21:00.000-04:00

All I want is sleep. Sleep, sleep and more sleep. After an entire month of spanish, that is 114 hours of class in 19 days, not to mention the 1-3 hours a night of studying and homework, I am now officially exhausted, both physically and mentally. I am on the verge of getting sick, I can feel it and that is just NOT acceptable! I started work at a Veterinary hospital last friday, the pay is great however I will have to get up at 6, leave by 7 to be at work at 7:30, work til 12, drive the 25 minutes back to Cleveland to sit in class from 1-5 every day this month.

I am taking Earth & Space science, and PS I loathe science, especially 4 hours a day!

So, I am tired and feeling icky and I would greatly appreciate ANY prayers you have,

thanks and much love,

Jill

Food for today's thought:

"Science is a cemetery of dead ideas" -Miguel de Unamuno

"If it's green or wriggles, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics"

-Handy Guide to Science

N-sane Ninth!

2008-05-14T21:57:00.001-04:00

Sorry for the lack of update, I have been soooooo busy with 6 hours a day of Spanish plus another 1-3 hours of studying every evening plus working out and sleeping haha! I don't have much to say other than Spanish is going remarkably better than I had thought, which is wonderful, but trust me it has not been easy! I will try to update later in the week!

Food for today's thought:

"Learn as much as you can while you are young, since life becomes too busy later."

-Dana Stewert Scott

Expressive Eighth.........

2008-05-04T16:33:00.000-04:00

String of Beads

A heart that is heavy and burdened- it beats so fast...

Memories strung through a mind like beads of glass.

Shiny, sparkling, alluring to some,

Painful, blinding, taunting to one...

One who walked through every thought,

One whose life is made up of things lost.

At times one wants to unstring those beads,

To let them fall to the ground as they please...

Although the temptation is there, one knows that those thoughts must stay in the air.

Thoughts whether of pain or not, bring to us remedies sought.

Food for today's thought:

"Poetry is just the evidence of life. If your life is burning well, poetry is just the ash."

-Leonard Cohen

Sleepy Seventh...

2008-05-03T22:13:00.000-04:00

Today I have been soo tired, I feel like I worked out all day long yesterday, which I kinda was what with lifting boxes and going up and down stairs and plus I stayed up 'til 3:30 this morning unpacking stuff, which I got a lot done, but today I have been exhausted! Hopefully I will get a second wind and finish unpacking everything before I start summer school on Tuesday!

Food for today's thought:

"There is a time for many words and there is also a time for sleep."

-Homer

Successful Sixth!

2008-05-02T23:48:00.001-04:00

Well, today I completely finished moving out and into my new place!!!! I am sooo happy, and extremely tired! My mom and Jonathan (BF) helped me sooo much in getting out of my old place and getting into my new place, they were AWESOME!

I have a TON of organizing and unpacking to do, but its all here and I am looking forward to this new room and place with new people :)

Food for today's thought:

"The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change." -Carl Rogers

Frantic Fifth!

2008-05-01T19:50:00.000-04:00

Today was moving day, and let me tell you it was crazy! U-Haul had all their trucks booked, so my sweet boyfriend went to Lowe's for me and rented a truck, it was $20 for 75 minutes and $5 for every 15 minutes after that...well we had it for 3 hours! God was looking out for us though because when we returned it to Lowe's, the girl who checked us in went to Lee, and was able to give it to us for the flat fee of $20 bucks and we didn't have to pay another dime! Thank the Lord!!! So, with the help of my sweet friends, all the big stuff has been moved to my new place, and there are only things that can be taken over in cars left, so we have a few more little trips and then there is the craziness of unpacking...My sweet mommy is coming up tomorrow to help me unpack and organize, which is a HUGE blessing because she is a great organizer! So, I am not sure where I am sleeping tonight, or where any of my stuff is lol, but I am excited about moving into a new phase of life...Keep me in your prayers guys, I need to work out my money situation for summer school!

Much love,

Jill

Food for todays thought:

"It is always the simple things that change our lives, and these things never happen when you are looking for them to happen. Life will reveal answers at the pace life wishes to do so. You feel like running, but life is on a stroll. This is how God does things." -Donald Miller

Fearful Fourth

2008-04-30T14:00:00.000-04:00

Yesterday I realized for the first time that I am graduating from college in 3 months! This extra year at Lee has been nice in a way because it has delayed "real-life' for awhile...Yesterday I realized that I am afraid to graduate, I don't know what I am going to do with my life after I finish school, I don't know how I am going to pay my school loans off, I need to get a good job but I don't feel that I am prepared to do anything!

My heart wants to do so many things, but I don't know how to make them happen. I want to do missions in Ireland, get my masters, open a counseling center and so much more...I know that God has this all in his hands, but I still feel so stranded. I am praying that God will continue to direct me, he has been doing a great job the past 22 years so I'm gonna let him continue, he knows much better then I do.

Food for today's thought:

"The future lies before you like a field of driven snow; be careful how you tread it, for every step will show." -Author Unknown

Truly the Third.

2008-04-29T13:35:00.000-04:00

Wellllll I had a long night last night full of questions. Its hard to explain it all here but I think that through some good advice and some contemplation, I know that I have made good decisions and I am proud of that. I know that I sound cryptic but I just want to get this off my chest without having to write about it all...

Anyway... today I will continue to pack and clean and finish my last exam-just a one page essay and then I'm done with this semester's classes, however next week I start summer school- Spanish 8-2 everyday for a month no bueno.

So, I am off to finish my exam and packing...

Food for today's thought:

"I bought a self-learning record to learn Spanish. I turned it on and went to sleep; the record got stuck. The next day I could only stutter in Spanish." -Unknown

Siked Second :)

2008-04-28T17:01:00.000-04:00

*Picture's of my room in the transition of moving...*

Well, today is my second posting here on my pretty green and pink space on the web :) I have had a pretty random day with few highlights...I am preparing to move out of my apartment this Thursday so I am in the process of throwing out stuff, deciding what I want to keep etc... I am very excited about moving in with my friend Hannah, she has a lovely 3 story house here in Cleveland that she owns herself, so I don't have to worry about grumpy old landlords which is a plus. I will have my own room, share a bathroom with 2 other girls, have utilities, internet, cable and rent all for the VERY low price of $160 a month, until July when I will be switching into a larger room (long story there) where I will pay $260, which is just about what I am used to paying now... So, those are the current plans, I am hoping that the move is smooth and not too stressful, I have moved 11 times since my Freshman year at Lee, this will be my 12th! I am an expert now haha!

Food for today's thought:

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity."

-Gilda Radner

~Jill

Fresh First.

2008-04-28T00:11:00.000-04:00

Earnest Hemingway said "All my life I've looked at words as though I were seeing them for the first time" and I agree with him. When I look at words or sentences, even though they are so familiar, they still hold some sort of fascination with me. Words have so much power; they can comfort, amuse, quiet, and rouse... its with these thoughts that I will start this blog, knowing that my words have some sort of place in this world...Come read at your own risk ;)

-The Histrionic Hammond turned Bubbly Blue-

Forever Fiftieth

For real? Fourty-Nine

For Forty-Eight...

Frightened Fourty-Seventh

Favorite Fourty-SIxth :)

Flipping Fantastic Fourty-Fifth!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fantastic Forty-Fourth!

Failed Fourty-Third.

Fulfilled Forty-Second

Frenzied Forty-First

Festive Fortieth

Thrilled Thirty-Ninth

Thanksgiving Thirty-Eighth

Total Thirty-Seventh

Tired of T's (and dreading the F's) Thirty-Sixth

Truly Thankful Thirty-Fifth

Tenacious Thirty-Fourth

Tearful Thirty-Third :)

Tremendous Thirty-Second

Thankful Thirty-First

Thought-filled Thirtieth

The Twenty-Ninth

Truthful Twenty-Eighth

Terrific Twenty-Seventh

Trip twenty-sixth

True Twenthy-Fifth

Thrilling Twenty-Fourth *UPDATE*

Tiring Twenty-Third

Trying Twenty-Second

Tragic Twenty-First

Terrible Twentieth

New Nineteenth

Energetic Eighteenth

Short Seventeenth

Sorta Sad Sixteenth

Feeling Fifteenth

Fresh Fourteenth

Toronto Thirteenth

The Totally Tired Twelfth!

Easier Eleventh

Tired Tenth...

N-sane Ninth!

Expressive Eighth.........

Sleepy Seventh...

Successful Sixth!

Frantic Fifth!

Fearful Fourth

Truly the Third.

Siked Second :)

Fresh First.

Thrilling Twenty-Fourth UPDATE