Thankful Thirty-First

It has been about a month and a half since I broke up with Jonathan and I can tell you that I am truly happy...

For three years I had mentally pictured myself with him... I had tried to mold myself into what I felt he wanted (this is really my fault), I had tried to side-step the things in him that I knew would clash with my heart and desires, I made excuses for our relationship, I tried to assure myself that time would bring about change and that maturity would come and that commitment would be there if I just did this, or this or this...

Wow, I was drained. 

There was so much of myself that I had let go of in many ways because I felt I had to be a certain person every day (this is also really my fault) and I was soo tired, and unable to see my life without him attached. 

This past month has been a huge mental, emotional, spiritual roller-coaster filled with doubts, hopes, fears and a happiness I have never known. 

I am so grateful for the time I spent with Jonathan... Being with him taught me so much about life from a different perspective, how to fight fairly, how to be fully committed and how to love... His friendship is something I will forever cherish and there will be a part of him in my heart always but I know that my decision was the right one for me...

Over the past month I started talking to a friend of mine- we've been friends for a year now- we rekindled our friendship and out of the clear blue, an attraction formed... it has been such a whirlwind, but it feels soo right. I have peace and joy and I am being treated like a queen, which has actually been hard to accept but I am learning. His words and actions have healed a place in my heart that I don't think I even knew needed healing... He and I are dating "officially" but still taking things one day at a time. I thank God for putting him into my life and I am excited to see where it goes :)

I hope that your first day of fall is free and fun and that you all enjoy it!

All my love,

Jill

Food for today's thought:

"Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom." 

-Marcel Proust